Changing for the Better

Happy Friday Sugar Plums,

Once again I'm killing time at work. It's a slow Friday but, then again, every day is slow so I shouldn't be surprised. I know I shouldn't write a blog about my store's financial issues but I'm going to and I'll deal with the consequences if they happen to arise.

I am a little concerned today. The failing economy has definitely taken it's toll on the store and I have a very strong feeling that we will close our doors soon. I can't blame this all on the economy though because my boss can't seem to manage her finances. I was informed yesterday that the guys who put up our sign have not been paid yet. Keep in mind, we have been open for a good 5 months now and this should have been dealt with. The sign guys informed us that they visited the court house before coming to our store and the money will get to them "whether we like it or not". If it were up to me I would have paid them on the spot but I don't have the authority to do so. I am the "manager" of this store but I have no clue what goes on half the time. There are many other people that have not been paid and my boss has chosen to avoid their phone calls, making no attempt whatsoever to pay them in any way. I am angry that I have gotten myself into this situation. I should have trusted my instincts when I took this position but the daydream of this job sucked me in. The daydream is now over and reality is slapping me in the face. I have tried to remain positive about my place of work. I have stood up for my boss when others talked down to her, I have dealt with the bill collectors calling non-stop and I have sat on my ass for too many hours. I'm tired and I need a change.

There is one problem with this "change" though. I'm only going to be in hays for 3 1/2 more months and trying to find a job right now is ridiculous. I've been browsing the classifieds and have found nothing. I feel helpless and I hate that more than I can say. All I want to is to straighten out my life and live comfortably. I want a job that is somewhat rewarding but what I really want to do is go back to school. I'm still trying to get things in line for Stella Adler but this lack of job security has been on my mind and has gotten in the way of what I want. I guess it's silly to have such big dreams when things are so uncertain. I still intend to turn this around and I refuse to let anything stop me.

I'm just stuck. I want to find a job that I can tolerate for another 4 months and then forget about. I am tired of being lied to at this job and I'm sick of how unreliable my boss has become. I'm starting to complain right now so I will stop. I'll keep you posted on what goes on in my life.