Life or Lack Thereof

Once again I am attempting to kill some time at work. It seems like my hours spent in this store drag on and fulfilling an 8 hr shift is liking pulling teeth. I fear that I am a little bitter on this random Thursday and that is due to the fact that my life is boring and I feel like don't have a purpose to get out of bed in the morning. I won't ramble on about my lack of direction but I will say that I officially have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life.

I made it through black Friday...barely. I managed to get sick just in time for Thanksgiving. 6 am came very early and between the cold winter chill and my fever I was not a happy camper that morning. Luckily, I looked awful enough that I got to go home early. I spent 4 hrs at the store and then enjoyed the rest of the freezing winter day from underneath my covers at home in bed. Words can't describe how pleasant that was. I've managed to recover from my holiday sickness but I'm sure it will return just in time for Christmas. *sigh*

Since my last blog I have once again lost the dating battle. I'm not sure what happened between me and the "awesome" guy but after our date he stopped talking to me. I guess he was turned off by my natural charm. I fear that I will once again be buying myself a bag of chocolates for Valentines day. A relationship probably would've kept me in Hays so I guess I should be glad that nothing developed. However, I am just about to give up on the idea of dating. It's too much work and I'm not sure if my heart can take anymore rejection. I apologize for sounding like a damsel in distress. Sometimes my dramatic side gets the best of me.

Recently I've been discussing my current unhappiness with anyone who will lend an ear and I've even gotten tired of explaining myself. My dreams of moving to the east coast seem to be a bit further away recently. My savings has kind of gone down the tubes and I also can't decide if I want to move that far away from my family. I really don't what I want to do. I've toyed around with the idea of moving to Colorado but that's just me trying to create some sort of plan. I would really like some guidance right now. I don't like feeling lost.